I’m Back

I’m back!

SO much to tell you.

Let me say that while I was gone from my little PW world, I tried to be normal. I attempted the whole “blog under real name, link to FaceBook, be open with everyone about what I was doing, etc.”

It didn’t work.

I barely wrote anything and anything I did write was so politically correct, nice and HORRENDOUSLY DULL! I found I couldn’t be myself, I always had to think about who (ie: family) could possibly end up reading this and could they take a badly worded sentence to mean something which it didn’t and take offence?


As many of you know, I stopped blogging under this account ages ago because I was being trolled and bullied quite badly. I received many hate-filled, bordering on violent, emails and comments from someone I think was a complete stranger but could’ve possibly been someone I knew many years ago (it was always difficult to tell to be honest.) It spooked me so I shut everything down and my very own hate-site finally disappeared. Whoever they were, I hope they have gotten bored with being a dickwad and don’t come back.

Troll aside, I feel like this place is more me. More anonymous, more secretive, more exciting, more open. It’s me as I am.

We’ll talk soon. xxx


You Asked….

Awhile ago, while in a little blogging rut, I told you all that you could ask me anything. Most questions were interesting, some were just people fishing for my bank account details. I have included them all (except the bank account ones, obviously…) here:

How many kids do you want, and is everything going well?

In my imagination, five kids sounds awesome. The reality of no sleep, a million nappies and countless tantrums per child will most likely bring that number down. Depending on how I go with pregnancy and conceiving, 2-3 kids will probably end up being our limit. However, I’m still awaiting my pre-conception obstetrician appointment but I’ll keep everyone posted.

Can we see a photo of the Swiss Wedding Extravaganza?

No. I desperately want to show you the most awkward wedding photo (there is a shot with them posing in the snow with the mountains in the background – it would be lovely but Sis-in-law has a look on her face that I think was supposed to be smouldering and sexy, but just makes her look constipated. Bro-in-law looks like a deer caught in the headlights. Poor bugger.)

What’s your real name?

Take a guess.

Why did you start blogging?

I needed a safe place to vent where I can be my usual direct, abrupt, opinionated self and not get told that I’m a hateful, horrible person. Or get interrupted. I hate getting interrupted.

What’s your favourite sexual position?

Whoever you are, please don’t come back to my blog.

What’s the best surprise you’ve ever gotten?

My favourite book is by a little-known American author. I’d been borrowing a copy from the library every time I wanted to read it because I’d not been able to track down a copy in any bookstore. One Christmas (I think it was 2006) Husband gave me my own copy – it had taken him 6 months of searching, but he finally managed to order it directly from the publisher. It’s one of my most beloved possessions.

Does pineapple belong on a pizza?

Hell no! Pizza is a savoury food – there is no place for sweet stuff on pizza. Don’t even get me started on dessert pizza! *vomits a little bit*By the way, I have a complicated set of food rules – one day I shall bore you with them.

Have you already got names picked out for your kids?

Sort of. Husband and I know what we’d name a boy but no idea when it comes to naming a girl. Needless to say, they will be normal names. None of this Abcde or Na-a or Jissycka. Normal names and normal spelling.

What’s your favourite chocolate?

Cadbury Dairy Milk.

Have you always lived in Perth?

No. I was born here but the family moved to Brisbane for about 16 months when I was a toddler. I don’t remember it. My mother remembers how large the insects were……


If anyone has any more questions, then feel free to ask them in the comments. I shall answer them. (Unless they’re crossing the line into TMI.)

Ask Me Anything

I’ve been struggling a bit with motivation this year. To be honest, I’ve been so flat-out busy that blogging has taken a back-seat to real-life stuff. Now that the “stuff” is beginning to die down, I’m finding my brain is being uncooperative. It doesn’t want to think about blogging.

So, I’m turning things over to my lovely readers.

You can ask me anything, (put your question in the comments, email it to me, or ask on Twitter) and I’ll turn it all into a little blog post (which will probably end up high-lighting all my bad points, but oh well – shit happens.)

OR, if there’s a blog post you’re itching to write and get some comments/feedback on but you’re too scared to put it on your own blog, then feel free to send it my way (perthwife[at]gmail.com) and I’ll publish it anonymously.

So, over to you…..


Belonging (v) Be rightly classified in or assigned to a specific category.

I’m one of those weird blogging creatures that doesn’t really fit in. There are the food bloggers who collectively eat at the most “in” cafes (when they aren’t at home just whipping up stuff like confit alpaca with an organic swede puree and a truffle foam for a casual Sunday lunch). Then there are the parenting bloggers with their own exclusive online communities, events and conferences ; the tech bloggers who are often gifted the latest gadgets ; the super-enthusiastic organic veggie growers who speak in Latin ; and the industry bloggers who appear to know every acronym under the sun.

Instead, (due to my lack of children, cooking talent and knowledge of a foreign language) I’m lumped in with “personal blogger”, which apparently has the connotation of a whinging, pimply-faced, horny teenager who hates with their parents.

That couldn’t be less me! (Well, apart from the whinging bit which I’m actually quite good at.) There are no offers of paid advertising, no conferences just for me and my kind, no breakfast clubs, no free ipads. Nothing.

[Note: To be honest even if I was offered these things I’m not sure I’d take them up on the offer, unless Cadbury wanted to give me chocolate in exchange for blog space – then I’d practically throw myself at their feet and would give them anything they asked for.]

But it does hurt to be constantly left out. It hurts to not be invited anywhere or to anything because I don’t (in the words of one well-known Perth blogger) “have anything to offer our unique group of talented individuals”.


Over the past few years, I’ve noticed that the blogging scene is really quite insular – unless you are clearly defined as a tech-blogger/food blogger/parent blogger/fitness blogger/whatever, then people don’t really want to know you. If you don’t fit into a certain box then they assume you have nothing to say, nothing to offer and no talent of any kind. You’re nothing if you can’t be clearly defined. In this way, it seems that real life and digital life unfortunately aren’t too dissimilar. I feel I feel a bit like I’m outside the Big Bloggy House looking in at all the bloggers who’ve found their tribe and are having a grand old time talking about how to child-wrangle one-handed or cook chicken liver and gooseberry cupcakes.

From my position outside the BBH (Big Bloggy House) and with my nose pressed up against the window (I like to see what I’m missing out on), I have witnessed some strange trends emerging. The food bloggers are often keen to support any over-priced and mediocre business simply because it’s the “in” thing at the moment. The tech bloggers are constantly bickering with each other over the latest i-product and how brilliant/shit/innovative/useless it is (they seem to change their minds on a weekly basis). The industry bloggers appear to be developing their own language. Meanwhile the parent bloggers are just trying to make it through the next two hours without mopping up some more vomit or being at the centre of a supermarket melt-down of epic proportions thanks to an over-tired toddler.

I suppose I’m jealous – it would be lovely to be able to talk about a shared passion or experience with a group of people from all walks of life. But I’m still looking for my tribe, my place to belong. I hope I find it soon – and I hope they don’t all talk in Latin!